Selling Sunset, Selling The Dream

Courtesy of ShoeDazzle

Selling Sunset is streaming for its seventh season, bringing us high-end houses, high fashion, strong women, and plenty of catfights.

There’s something so hypnotic about watching these perfect people dealing in multi-million dollar properties and bickering all the while. Curled up in my guilt (at how much I enjoy this trashy/aspirational show), I found myself wondering whether this was another reality show mocking women who show off their femininity and their emotions, or whether this was the pinnacle of TV, really representing women as three-dimensional characters in their own stories.

The American Dream

There is something about the lifestyle on Selling Sunset that ticks all the boxes we’ve been taught to aspire to; Insta-famous? Check. Luxury property in LA? Check. Beautiful hair, makeup, and outfits every single day? Check.

Through the complicated narratives of friendships, romances, and falling-outs, we hear the real stories of these women's lives; growing up with nothing, finding their way in the real estate world, raising their kids, dealing with health issues… we are given just enough to realize that they are self-fulfilled success stories. The true American dream of finding your way to the top despite the odds. That’s something we can all aspire to, and watching women pursue (not to mention achieve) success this way isn’t something we get to see every day. Female ‘success stories’ are so often about family or romance, while men dominate the business world and work their way up to a respectable and high-earning job. Seeing a group of women who have done this, often without a male partner’s presence on screen with them, gives me a somewhat satisfying feeling. I’m rooting for all of them.

The Aesthetic of the Crew

The stunning aesthetic of these women has to be commented on; honestly, it's probably a big reason that a lot of people tune in, who doesn't like watching beautiful women? The storylines and the drama are important, but the fact they’re all very easy to look at doesn’t hurt. I think it’s all too easy to see beautiful women on reality TV and dismiss them as untalented, riding on their looks, or in it for the wrong reasons. Especially when women are dressed in a hyper-feminine way; showing skin, tottering on big heels, with fresh blowouts and perfect makeup. All these displays of femininity too often equal dismissal. It’s been a source of frustration to me my whole life. A woman wearing a full pink gown has just as many important things to say as a woman in a simple black suit and flats, just as much talent, and just as much potential. Seeing these women embrace their womanhood the way that they want to, practical or not, and kick ass selling hugely expensive houses in the dog-eat-dog world of luxury real estate...kind of a reset. If some people do dismiss them as ‘silly women’ for the way they look, and the producers lean into their arguments and drama more than they lean into their successes - well, that’s their loss.

Women at War

I’ve mentioned the show's focus on interpersonal drama above all else; after all, that’s the juicy, emotional reason that we all press play. The reason we like certain characters and not others, and the reason we get hooked. It always seems a shame when women are portrayed as catfighting. Being a gender historically linked to hysteria, jealousy, and gossiping, seeing that representation play out in the modern day is a bitter blow. But actually, I don’t think it has to be a problem here. We do also see the realtors ring their office bell when they make sales, we see them make recommendations about the market and prove themselves as really skilled businesswomen. We also catch a glimpse of the men of the office, owners and twin brothers Jason and Brett Oppenheim, and their drama with relationships, with staff, and their thoughts on the conflicts. And most importantly of all - women do fall out, men fall out, everyone falls out. Women shouldn’t need to restrain their emotional responses out of fear of being labelled crazy. Do men rein in their shouting, their storming off, or their expressions of natural emotions? No. So often, women do, because we have to in order to have any chance of being taken seriously. As someone who holds everything back for this reason and is actively trying to become stronger at asserting myself, establishing boundaries, and defending myself, watching these beautiful and successful women be their own spokesperson without a second thought about how someone may react to their emotions, is honestly quite freeing. Whether we’re talking about relationships, outfits, business deals, or disagreements, there is no holding back and there is no shame. Could showing up for yourself be the biggest trend of the season?